Finally texting with my boyfriend after over a week of no communication! It’s 1:03am here right now in San Diego and as usual, I’m too excited to try and sleep. They’re finally off the ship after 39 consecutive days at sea, ouch! I’m glad that I’m getting to talk to him. He’s just purchased an outrageously overpriced international phone and we shall attempt wifi enabled calling sometime in the next two days. I have a group of friend’s in town for our mutual friend Shirley’s bachelorette party so the actuality of us having time to talk is iffy.
I’ve come to well and truly dislike that I can’t have a continuous conversation with my boyfriend. There’s so much that happens in my day, week, life in general that I don’t bother telling him about because 1. He most likely won’t be able to read it until days after it happened, 2. He’ll have no idea what or whom I’m talking about and 3. He doesn’t care/I know he can’t do anything to help me.
I wanted to tell him all about the drunken fuck storm that was Opening Day at the restaurant (Opening Day refers to the start of the horse race season at the track by the restaurant). I wanted to tell him about the apartment hunting I’ve been doing and the endless emails. I wanted to tell him I’m going to buy a new bed and that I’ve consolidated three credit cards and want to find a new airlines to start earning frequent flier miles with (since I hear nothing good about the Virgin America/Alaska Airlines merge). I wanted to tell him gossip with my family and friends and co-workers. I want to tell him everyday that I miss him FAR MORE than I thought I would.
I know it’s not his fault. I know he can’t control when he’s able to talk. But I still hate it. I hate that I have to wait for him to initiate our conversations. I hate that I haven’t seen his face or heard his voice in almost three months. I hate that when we do get to talk it’s usually past midnight my time. I hate that even when I’m bleary eyed and only semi conscious that I am COMPELLED to reply to him because I don’t know when I’ll get to again. I hate that I have no control.
What I really hate is that it’s just barely halfway over. Then we get to do it all over again next summer with his new ship.